If anyone should feel Peer Pressure, it should be Dr. Swier

I was sent this article a few weeks ago to cover on my show.  Currently, the writer of the article, Dr, Richard Swier, is a talk show host on another station in Bradenton.  The last thing I want to do is give this man an opportunity to spew the hate that I see written in his post.  I am not even certain that my show is the right vehicle to talk about this because I don't want it to be percieved as a war between to talk show hosts.  And yet, to not address this article is a crime within itself.  So I am doing it here. Where my words will be on record.

I have listened, read, and tolearted many things in order to find the core of who we are as a nation.  We are often dissatisifed with our accomplishments and are quick to find fault in each other due to the frustration that we find within ourselves.  And yet, when we look globally at other nations, it is easy to see that what seperates us from the rest of the world is our humanity.  When all else fails, it is our ability to empathize with the pain and hardship felt by those around us.   This is our bottom line.

So when I read an article written by a man who lives in my town and feels self-righteous enough to condone and justify hate crimes against our children, I am beside myself.  And I do consider bullying in our schools a hate crime.  

 In his article, he writes:

"This is not bullying. It is peer pressure and is healthy. There are many bad behaviors such as smoking, under age drinking and drug abuse that are behaviors that cannot be condoned. Homosexuality falls into this category. Homosexuality is simply bad behavior that youth see as such and rightly pressure their peers to stop it." - Dr. Richard Swier

I won't even address his argument about homosexuality being a choice as this writer obviously believes.  What scares me even more is the statement that "peer pressure is healthy" and that students "rightly pressure their peers to stop it."  


In all of my years, I have yet to see any peer pressure received as a healthy way to stop a behavior.  I worry about the children in school who are subjected to a wide array of taunting by their peers because of their obvious differences.  I worry about the young men and women who are uncertain of themselves and look for acceptance and validation only to receive ridicule and disdain.  


In a child's mind, what separates the bullying of another child who is perceived to be gay, from one who is perceived to be a "geek" or a "square" or just different from the rest?  At the Annual Christmas Pageant of my son's school there was one young man in choir out of 25 girls.  When I asked why there were no other boys in choir, a young man told me that no other boys wanted to be considered "Gay."  It was the "peer pressure" perceived by this young group of boys that kept them from of learning how to sing. 


I went for a parent visit and passed a young girl who was sitting alone at a lunch table, when all other tables were crowded.  I learned that it was decided by her group of girlfriends that she could not longer sit with them because she was no longer deemed as popular.  They went even further to not allow anyone else to sit with her so everyone would know that she was no longer accepted in that group.  It was the"peer pressure" that taught this little girl that she had no value to those she cared about.  And it was the same peer pressure that kept anyone else from coming to her rescue.


My son came home one day upset after wearing a pair of Converse sneakers to school.  Apparently, Converse basketball sneakers have become popular among young girls.  Because of that, my son was called a "girl" all day for wearing "girls shoes."  Sneakers, that we clearly get out of the boys shoe department, and the same sneakers that have been worn for decades by basketball players.  Who knew that all of those men were setting a trend for a teenage girl's fashion? So thanks to that "Peer Pressure" my son was subjected to ridicule all day because he thought Converse Sneakers were cool. 


Kids have a hard enough time as it is fitting in even in the best of schools and the best of families.  Whether a child is gay or straight, smart or dumb, good looking or funny looking - the last thing that they need is an adult to say it's okay to provoke, ostracize, or punish anyone for being different.  


How can we be okay with this? How can we stand by and allow this man to use our children to further his career and push his message?  This is a man who represents our veterans?  This is a man who represents the Republican Party of Sarasota and The Tea Party of Sarasota?  He stands with politicians and with parents?  His show is supported by local leaders and advertisers?  Do they agree with what he says? Is this message okay by them?


If anyone should feel peer pressure, it should be this man. It is time for his peers to show him that his views of hate towards another human being must stop.  It is time for us to demand that he cease from telling parents that it is okay to let their children pressure each other for what he calls a "bad behavior."  

My last post here was January 7th, 2011.  To say the least, I have been delinquent in keeping up with my posts, and yet I have been incredibly busy in keeping up with all that is happening in Sarasota and beyond.

Since May 2, 2011, I have been broadcasting a new show on a new radio station.  Sarasota Talk Radio is the place I call home - WTMY radio 1280 AM.  You will find me there weekdays from 3pm - 6pm talking to not only the people that make Sarasota everything it is, but everything it is going to be.

My new co-host is Lauren Rudd. Most of you know him from the newspaper where he has had a syndicated column for the past 24 years called - Street Wise.  Locally, he his column appears every Friday in the Sarasota herald Tribune.  Now you can hear him everyday with me.  He is on between the hours of 4pm-5pm, where he covers Wall Street and how it impacts our daily lives.

The great thing about my job is that I get to see a part of our community that doesn't lie among the headlines or is enveloped in the talking points.  I get to meet people that bring their own unique twist to what makes us great.  I also get to talk to the people who politically shape the framework of our community.

So tune in and follow along.  Or call in and participate.  Open dialogue is always encouraged.

www.SarasotaTalkRadio.com  is also broadcast on the Internet.

It's a new adventure for me.  I hope you follow along.

ELEPHANTS STROLL MAIN STREET IN HOLIDAY PARADE

Sarasota, FL: For the first time in three decades, elephants will stroll down Main Street in the annual Downtown Sarasota Holiday Parade tomorrow Saturday, December 4 at 7:00 p.m. The parade starts at U.S. 301 and Main Street and travels southwest along Main Street to Gulfstream Avenue. Two Indian elephants will participate in the parade.

As a way to recognize Sarasota’s deep roots with elephants, tigers, clowns, trapeze artists and more, this year’s theme for the holiday parade is the circus. Many community members, including Mayor Kelly Kirschner<http://www.sarasotagov.com/InsideCityGovernment/Content/Commissioners/Commissioners/Kirschner.htm>, the Big Cat Habitat and Gulf Coast Sanctuary, Circus Sarasota, the PAL Sailor Circus and Downtown Sarasota Celebrations, Inc., joined forced months ago to coordinate the circus theme. The participation of the pachyderms was just confirmed this week. They reside in the Gainesville area, and Westfield Southgate Shopping Mall is picking up the transportation tab. Besides the two elephants, the circus section of the parade also will include clowns and a big top van. “Sarasota and the circus are irrevocably linked,” said Mayor Kirschner. “It’s these little things that differentiate cities from one another; create a unique sense of place; and reinforces what home is for all of us.”

Historically, a circus parade was held every winter in Sarasota when the circus returned to the area for the winter. The last time an elephant walked down Main Street as part of the holiday parade, in 1974, famed animal trainer Gunther Gebel-Williams was riding atop it with a live tiger wrapped around his neck.

A total of 85 units will participate in this year’s parade including marching bands, floats, and local dignitaries. And, of course, a jolly old elf from the North Pole is expected to make a special appearance -- after the pachyderms. The parade is organized by Downtown Sarasota Celebrations, Inc.

The family fun will begin prior to the parade, with an inaugural tree lighting at 5:30 p.m. at the newly renovated Five Points Park in downtown. Plan to arrive in downtown early as Main Street from U.S. 301 to Gulfstream Avenue will close to vehicular traffic at 5:00 p.m.

For more information contact Paul Thorpe with Downtown Sarasota Celebrations at 941-356-6646 or the Downtown Sarasota Alliance at 941-366-7040.

Sarasota Mayor Kelly Kirschner decides not to run for re-election to City Commission

November 16th, 2010 by Susan Nilon in News, Politics, Sarasota-Manatee

Sarasota Mayor Kelly Kirschner has decided not to run for re-election. After serving just one term, he made history as the youngest mayor in Sarasota history. CL met with him what to discuss what led to his decision and what he will do next.

CL: There has been a lot of speculation as to whether or not you will seek a second term. It is my understanding that you have decided not to run for re-election. Can you tell us why?
Kelly Kirschner: When I ran for office, it was just my wife and I. We were children-free and my ability to commit to something like the City Commission was an easy decision to make. Since then, we have had two children and things have obviously changed dramatically. My life right now, my family’s personal and financial balance and well-being are paramount in our lives. That is what I need to focus on.

Was it an easy decision to make?
No. No, it wasn’t an easy decision to make. Certainly, I have enjoyed the job and the challenges it brings. There have been some difficult losses, but I certainly have enjoyed the job.
The FPL decision and the way that it went was unfortunate. Had that gone on and we had a longer conversation, I think that this decision would have been much more difficult to make because it was something that I was putting a lot of pressure on. I was very interested to see it through as successfully as possible. But by virtue of the fact at our last meeting the (FPL) decision was made, it made this decision that much more “easy” — if that’s the way to put it — for me.

Is there anything that you would like to see through before you leave office?
Yes. I think there is a tremendous amount of work that is left to be done. I think there are a number of families and individuals, particularly in my district, that are hurting. Working families, like mine, that are going through really difficult decisions on whether they can continue to stay in this community. Whether they want to raise their children here — even though they love this place. Things have to get better. Jobs need to be created and we need to find a stabilized place for our entire market here locally. That is probably one of the biggest challenges for the city right now and for our residents.

Do you know what your plans are after your term is up?
Right now, I have been working for the past few years with my brother and his partner in a Spanish-language firm. So we will continue to grow that. I will certainly be looking again at the full-time opportunities that, obviously, for the past four years I have not had that luxury to do. Until now, I have been working on a project to project basis with my brother’s company.

The job of City Commission is a part-time position that requires your full amount of time. It is also a low paying position. If those things were different, would you reconsider?
I think we can talk about a thousand different variables. I don’t know if it is necessarily productive and realistic. It would certainly change my mind. We have some issues with my first son. He was in the hospital for close to a half a year. And we have our own family issues that we need to address and deal with in a responsible fashion. There was a guy at a ribbon cutting ceremony this past week in Newtown who recited a quote from Martin Luther King that I thought was really appropriate for that groundbreaking. It’s certainly appropriate for me. From my own personal life and from all of our own personal lives, “I can’t be what I ought to be unless you can be what you want to be and you can’t be what you want to be until I can be what I ought to be.” It’s part of the interconnected reality of all of this. I certainly need to get back to what I ought to be for my family. I hope that it will continue to be good and have areas for participation to continue to create the best place for my children to grow up in this community too.

The position of City Commissioner is traditionally held by someone who is retired from business. Do you see a way that we can continue to attract people from a younger generation to fill the position?
I guess the first half is that I have been able to do it for four years and it is not impossible. Historically we get individuals who run and fill the post who are retired. I certainly appreciate that there is a lot of merit in that And because of that, we get some great individuals who chose to run and help us guide our city. I do, however, think that there has got to be a consideration and conversation on how we can ensure that there is balance at the table. Not only in age, but race. I know that we have a charter review committee that is actually discussing these things right now. Hopefully part of their deliberations will continue to be about what they think, what we think as a community, is the optimum mix for what a commission should look like. Ideally, it should be the most talented, prepared, and diverse body that will represent all interest of the city and continue to move us forward in the right direction.

What was the biggest challenge that you faced during your four years in office?
The biggest challenge was time and balancing that with another job — all of the demands of raising a family with young children. More than anything, it’s time. The opportunity to constantly be forced to address a completely new issue — issues that you would not have necessarily studied or looked at before — is certainly is one of the great things of the job. You are constantly forced to learn new things and read new things. In many ways, challenge yourself that otherwise in your daily life you don’t get to have that type of experience. That is one of the great things about the constant learning from being a public servant.

Would you consider running for a higher office?
At this point I really haven’t thought about it at all. I am more focused on getting myself and my family back to where we need to be and regain that balance.

Will you endorse another candidate for your position?
I haven’t really thought about it. I believe that there are competent candidates for District Three and I hope that they will step up.

Do you have any regrets?
Yes, there are a number of regrets. Unfortunately I have been on the losing end of a number of votes. I have regret on those votes that I was not able to either mobilize citizenry or be more persuasive at the table to win and claw back two additional votes to change an issue. I think some of these issues that have been on the losing side were really significant to our city and how we project ourselves to the world, how we get to the place that we should, and want to be in the years to come for our children to inherit. Yes, there are a lot of votes that I regret that weren’t won.

After the four years, is there anything that you carry with you that make you proud of the work you have done?
There is a lot to be proud of. For the four years that I have been on the commission, the number one priority of the city has been that we have engaged other governmental agencies (including the school board, the hospital board, and the Sarasota County Commission) to collaborate on as much as possible to ensure that we are all thinking about decades of failed public investment and our changing realities — having the transformational affect that we have to have in North Sarasota. Hopefully, getting ourselves on a path and into the place that we can have the conversations across the community and across the governmental bodies to make the impact that needs to be had.

Is there any advice that you would offer to the person who would take your place?
Talk to as many people as you can before you go into a commission meeting, and listen.

Any final words?
Nothing in particular. I am happy that I ran for the City Commission on a platform of inclusiveness and that the table at City Hall is for the entire community. I think there is a period of time, particularly during the hay day of the real estate boom, where a lot of our citizens, middle and lower classes, felt that that was not the case. I think that there was a large sense of disenfranchisement by some of the less affluent neighborhoods in particular on being able to have a sense of ownership of the City that they belong to — where they pay taxes — and how they create the vision and the future shape of the city. I certainly hope that everything that I initially campaigned upon and spoke about when I ran for office that I not only talked the talk, but walked the walk. I don’t really have any regrets. It is unfortunate that I was not on the winning side of all of these votes, but certainly that I do feel confident that I have represented my constituents well. I look forward to speak to those issues when I am back on the other side of the table again at the end of this coming spring.

Reprinted from Creative Loafing

Mayors' Feed the Hungry Thanksgiving Food Drive 2010 Sarasota